An Untitled Pain
Nicole Yvonne Lovett
 
Between lovely joined lines, they go
A battered heart that played with stone,
(skipping class to skip thoughts to skip implosion, outbursts at home; tell me why the ketchup’s on the floor and where your mind went)
Failed school sessions, ruined relationships, attempted lovers
(majestic gowns, I dress, dancing across dreams that will continue to rip
at all seams for centuries after our children die and I look for you in the sky)
All faults not my own
Missed concerts and missed intentions,
Between joined lines, battered soul, they go
And when I get off the stage everything stays
on the page (I’m staying up against
metaphors and dreams, they’re my jail and my release, am I guilty or innocent, judge, please..)
The intricacy does not flow as well as it could (waterfalls continue to go even as pollution taints their soul but my oceans are often holding still)
When I talk, it’s like I’m trapped in a mental, physical cage, so I inflict upon myself certain kinds of rage, little voices raised:
“Why can’t you be more like
the brave girl
on the page”
“You are
your own
slave”


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